Love Sex & Life

Marriage like I know it is usually goes; boy meets girl, they make a love connection, boy (or girl) pops the question and they both make a conscious decision to spend the rest of their lives together with the commitment of marriage. Things don't go this way for a lot of people though, it has become increasingly common these days to marry in absentia, which sometimes means marrying someone you never physically met or holding the wedding when one party (usually the husband) is not physically present.

Is marriage on your wish list for 2014? It is definitely normal to want to settle down with your future husband or wife and move on the the next of your life. No doubt, you've heard a VERY mixed bag of experiences and advice when it comes to marriage, but ultimately are you ready for this 'lifetime' commitment? Answer these questions originally posted on africansweetheart.blogspot.co.uk and decide for yourself

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I used to think I had my stuff together. Then I got married.

Marriage is great—but it rocked everything I knew. I quickly realized my basic goal in life, prior to getting married, was to simply remain undisturbed.

This "disruption" came suddenly and was disguised as a 5-foot-nothing Swedish-Filipino woman. When I decided I'd rather not live without her, I proceeded to ask her to marry me—that is, to officially invite someone who wasn't me to be in my personal space for the rest of my life.

My friend and I were discussing what's always on everyone's mind these days: love and relationships. We were updating each other on our potential plus ones when I asked, "Why do I have to be in love with the person I marry? Why can't I marry a man because I believe he'll be a good father and/or a good provider?" My friend perished the thought and expressed that marrying for reasons, not including love, would be settling. I disagreed.

Who says real love doesn't exist? When this facebook post popped up in my timeline I expected to read another 'my bestfriend my soulmate'  type epistle, but Bola's authenticity screamed louder which each sentence I read. Like me, I'm sure most married couples can relate. I don't know this couple but I with them both many more love filled years.

Strange but true, a guest married a jilted bride when the groom did not turn up at a recent indian wedding. The jilted 23-year-old bride was left high and dry at the altar when her 35 year old groom got cold feet and skipped town. The 30 year old guest, originally meant to serve as a witness at the ceremony, stepped in to 'save the day'. The wedding proceeded as scheduled with the bride and guest becoming Mr. & Mrs.

As long as I can remember, men have been the one under the microscope when it comes to issues of infidelity as they have been labeled "the notorious wild seed sowers".

"Marry me! (and my family)".

I met Stephen when I was at University. A few years older than myself, he was a junior Dr at the local hospital (friend of a friend type thing).

I was bowled over by what I thought was his charm and sophistication, I later came to realise that he was manipulative and cold but more of that later.

He had a relatively privileged upbringing as the only child of older parents who made sacrifices (enormous sacrifices really), whilst I was the younger of two children in a family where my dad had made a reasonable amount of money from his own business.