Newlyweds: Here's what to know when planning for a child

Photo Credit: Instagram/munaluchibride

Making decisions about having a baby as newlyweds vary. Some may decide to have a child years after their wedding and others, almost immediately. Whatever category you may fall in, here are some of the things you should prepare for before having your first child. 

 

 

  • Mental preparation

Contrary to cultural beliefs, having a baby requires that you're mentally prepared for it. Make sure the decision to having a child is solely coming from you and your spouse. 

When you fall prey to the societal constructs about marriage and childbearing, you may be taking in a lot more than you envisioned. Realise everything is about to change and work towards building a stronger and healthier relationship before your baby comes.

 

 

  • Finances 

Having a newborn comes with its perks and consequences. However, you must be financially prepared when planning to have a child. Consider hospital bills, clothes, food, schooling and a lot more before deciding to make babies. Also, your finances can help you determine the number of kids you want. 

 

 

  • Compromise 

You have to realise that there are certain times you will compromise. Are you willing to stay up till 2 am or miss that Friday night hangout for your newborn? Having a child will require all your time. The little time you eventually have for yourselves will be borrowed time. Understand that the responsibility may be overwhelming and working together is the only possible solution. 

 

 

  • Support

Your spouse may be going through physical, mental and emotional stress. These periods are a very crucial part of your lives. The great times where you laugh with your spouse do exist. However, on the bad days, you will need to provide support. For instance, you may want to stand in when your spouse cannot handle your new born's tantrums. Saying encouraging words and taking actions will help a great deal during the low days. 

 

 

  • Learning 

Realise that you're bringing another human into the world. Make sure you both learn how to become better versions of yourselves. The reason is simple; your child will imitate everything you bring to him/her. So, work on yourselves constantly. Having a newborn needs you to be open to learning and unlearning so many habits and cultures that you're used to. That way, you can be sure you're transferring the best parts of you into your child. 

 

 

Written by Ojatula Opeyemi